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Church Bulletin Bloopers Galore

Unanswered Prayer

Subject: FUNNIES

A little boy went up to his father and asked: "Dad, where did all of my intelligence come from?" The father replied. "Well,
son, you must have got it from your mother, cause I still have mine"

"Mr. Clark, I have reviewed this case very carefully," the
divorce court Judge said, "And I've decided to give your wife $775 a
week," "That's very fair, your honor," the husband said. "And every now and
then I'll try to send her a few bucks myself,"

A doctor examined a woman, took the husband aside, and said, "I don't like the looks of your wife at all," "Me neither
doc," said the husband. "But she's a great cook and really good with the
kids.

An old man goes to the Wizard to ask him if he can remove a curse he has been living with for the last 40 years. The Wizard says, "Maybe, but you will have to tell me the exact words that were used to put the curse on you.  The old man says without hesitation, "I now pronounce you man and wife."


A blonde calls Delta Airlines and asks, "Can you tell m how long it'll
take to fly from San Francisco to New York City?" The
agent replies, "Just a minute..." "Thank you," the blonde says, and hangs up.

Two Mexican detectives were investigating the murder of Juan Gonzalez.  "How was he killed?" asked one detective. "With a golf gun," the other detective replied. "A golf gun?! What is a golf gun?"
"I don't know. But it sure made a hole in Juan."

The investigation of Martha Stewart continues. Her recipe for chicken
casserole is quite efficient. First you boil the chicken in water. And then you dump the stock.

Moe: "My wife got me to believe in religion."
Joe: "Really?"
Moe: "Yeah. Until I married her I didn't believe in hell."

A man is recovering from surgery when a nurse asks him how he is
feeling. "I'm O. K. but I didn't like the four-letter-word the doctor used in surgery," he answered. "What did he say," asked the nurse. "OOPS!"